The Importance of Consistency in Managing your Mental Health
When it comes to just about anything in life, consistency matters. Especially when taking care of your mental health. It can be hard to balance work, school, family, etc., and also take care of yourself. However, the key here is to making your mental health a priority. Making your mental health a priority is challenging, I can attest to this in my own life (and I’m a counselor!). Yet, the way to really take charge and see change in your life is to take care of you. If you’re not able to care for yourself, other areas of your life may start to suffer from you not being cared for. Let’s talk about what it looks like to be consistent with your mental health, some tips for staying consistent, and how to overcome the desire to ruminate and procrastinate.
What does consistency look like with mental health?
Let’s first define consistency. Consistency, depending on where you look, means to conform to something, stick with something, togetherness without contradiction. Consistency is best understood as routine or schedule in today’s world. All over social media, you might see people talking about consistency. Being consistent with a workout routine, or eating healthy, or taking their spirituality seriously. Whatever the thing is you’re doing, essentially, sticking or adhering to it is what makes you consistent.
When it comes to your mental health, being consistent is a top priority. By following some of the tips below to stay consistent, and sticking to your word, you are going to see life changes you never thought possible. The same is true if things don’t change. If you continue to say “I’ll do it later”, or “I’ll start tomorrow”, the reality is that these statements will only push you further and further from the reality you desire. Mental health consistency is key to a life where you can thrive, and enjoy each day. Without taking care of yourself consistently, it’ll be much harder to care for others, and to do the things that are required of you on a daily basis. Here are a few of the things you can be doing to care for your mental health on a regular basis. Next section is devoted to some tips on staying consistent.
Attending therapy regularly: I know, I know, my bias is showing, right? But coming to therapy on a weekly or bi-weekly basis, provides consistency in your life. You can’t really work on something in therapy by attending one session here, and a few there. It takes consistently showing up, engaging in your session, completing your outside of session work, and talking about the hard stuff to really get the results you’re looking for. Now, I get it, sometimes life happens and you miss a few sessions. Yet the key here isn’t berating you into attending when you’re actually too busy to attend. The key here is to attend with as much consistency as you can, and engage in a way that helps you see changes and lessening of symptoms in whatever you’re experiencing. By sticking with a routine of therapy, you can start to see results quicker. Eventually, you won’t even need to attend therapy, but that’s for you and your therapist to decide when the end of therapy has come.
Taking medications regularly: Now this can be tricky for some people. Some people, like myself, can’t remember to take a simple vitamin, which doesn’t hurt to do inconsistently as much as not taking a consistent dose of Prozac might hurt. However, writing reminders, sticking to a schedule for medications, setting alarms, making it fun, or doing something to get yourself interested in taking medications on a daily or weekly basis can be the most valuable thing you do for yourself. Even if you’re not attending therapy, medication regularity is still crucial to helping maintain good mental well-being. If you have trouble taking medications regularly, keep reading to see what kind of skills and tools you can use to start being more consistent with your medications.
Engaging in regular exercise: This doesn’t have to be a 1 hour workout every single day, or even several times per week. Put simply, regular exercise could be getting a 15 minute walk in every other day, or doing a big walk 3 times per week. Regardless of the method of exercise, the amount or anything else, the key here is consistency. By sticking with a routine (not a schedule necessarily), you are creating space for yourself to be taken care of physically, and this promotes better mental health. In fact, some cognitive therapies promote the use of exercise as a coping strategy to overcome depression and anxiety symptoms. The last note on this is that personally, when I found myself struggling with some anxieties in life, I found running to be very helpful (mostly walking but I like to call it running). Not only did I find myself in a better headspace after going out on my run, I’d also feel better in the days following that run as well. I’m not saying “go run” or literally for you to do any specific exercise at all. All I’m saying is consistency in your exercise, whether that’s walking, weightlifting, cycling, or whatever you like (or will soon like) to do, consistency in your exercise is the key to helping your mental health.
Eating well: Something people are constantly talking about on social media is healthy eating. Of course, there are 400 ways to eat “right”. But the reality is, you don’t have to do what everyone else is doing. Find what works for you. Maybe that looks like the 80/20 rule, where you “indulge” 20 percent of the time but 80 percent of the time you’re eating well and giving yourself good nutrient dense foods. Eating well matters because your gut directly affects how you’re feeling. Ever notice after a ton of snacking you feel “hungry” but really you’re bored, and unsatisfied? Suddenly you start to feel dissatisfied with most areas of your life, and maybe even start ruminating. Eating “junk food” (think excessive amounts, not small amounts), has been linked to causing symptoms of depression. These symptoms you feel after having too much junk aren’t just in your head, it’s actually happening in your body. For that reason alone, it’s important to take care of your mental health through eating well. Again, this doesn’t have to be restrictive diets, pick what works for you and something you can implement easily into your lifestyle. Keep reading for some tips on staying consistent.
Get out: I mean outside. This doesn’t have to be a fancy endeavor, or anything wild. Again, as with anything, this needs to be consistent. That could look like going outside for 5 minutes every morning, or during your lunch break. Maybe right after dinner. If you have kids, this is a great routine to put in place to help them get sun in their eyes for a few minutes each day. Yes, even when it’s cold outside. Getting outside has been shown to have immense benefits for your mental health, and can help you feel more like yourself overall when you do this on a regular basis. If you want to read more on going outside and how it benefits your mental health, check out our blog on getting outside for your mental health.
Even when chaos is around you, having some routine can really help you take the edge off the chaos. Consistency in life can give you safety, security, and enjoyment (even if you don’t think so yet, give it a try and see what changes in your life). Feelings of safety and security are often the cure to feelings of anxiety. Why? Since anxiety is a response to the unknown, safety is the opposite. It’s a sense of knowing that even when things aren’t as they typically are, it will be okay. When you have a consistent routine, you’re creating a sense of safety. You know that, even if your world seems to be falling apart today, you’re going to get on the treadmill, or spend 5 minutes outside, or talk to your therapist this week on Tuesday at 5pm. These little things create feelings that oppose anxiety, and that allow you to stay centered in your life. Try being consistent with at least 1 thing from this list, and see how it goes. If you want more tips on how to stay consistent, keep reading.
Tips to Stay Consistent
Make big goals, small: Instead of attempting to achieve everything in one day, stay consistent by making your biggest goals small. For instance, if your big goal is to walk at least 5,000 steps per day every day for a month. Break that down into weeks, or even just one day at a time. Focus on how you can make the goal manageable, and continue building your consistency. If your big goal is to walk at least 15,000 steps every day and doing so at least 15 days out of the month. You can break this down as well by doing 5,000 steps per day for 2 weeks, then 8,000 steps per day for 2 weeks, and building slowly on this progress until you’re consistently able to walk that 15,000 steps. In terms of therapy, this could look like “breaking generational curses” as your big goal. To break this down, you might say “I will attend therapy at least 2 times per month for 1 year, and start learning coping strategies to help reduce negative thoughts”. This could also look like attending therapy weekly, allowing yourself to learn skills necessary to relax in the moment, change your thoughts, and increase desired actions you want to be taking in every day life. Then diving into the bigger issues of trauma, difficult memories, and other things that contribute to the generational curses you’ve experienced.
Learn to love your achievements: When most people start something new, they tend to focus on their past failures, what they haven’t done already, and how little progress they’ve already made. Imagine trying to start every day with this mindset, and wondering “why can’t I get ahead”? Well, to some the answer is clear, but to many who think this way (I used to think this way, so I get it) the answer is far from them and they feel quite lost in their circumstances, past failures, etc. The truth is, to start something new and be able to lead with consistency, the focus has to shift to being on your past achievements and current achievements. Whether an achievement from high school, last year, or yesterday, the focus needs to be on those wins you’ve already had. This provides you with the evidence you can do anything even when the thing you’re doing is tough. In practice, this could look like this: You missed your therapy session yesterday, you start thinking, “I might as well stop going”, “my therapist isn’t going to want to see me”, “I just don’t think I can work on myself”. These thoughts lead to another missed session the next week, and the week after, resulting in your therapist ending your treatment. This end to treatment “proves” to you what you were already thinking. However, it’s the act of missing the sessions that contributed to the end of therapy - not you being bad at therapy, or not being able to work on yourself. Instead of worrying about a missed session, change the thoughts you have (this is a skill we will cover more fully in the next section), and lean into the thought of, “well, I did attend therapy for at least 3 sessions in a row, that was a good start”. Then connect with your therapist to help you stay accountable for your next session, assert your desire to attend, and commit to going to the next session - even though it might be difficult!
Dwell in the present: Some say that dwelling on things is bad. I’d agree with them for the most part, but I think dwelling on the present can be helpful… So long as the focus is on achievements, small goals, and helpful thoughts. This can look like writing down gratitude lists for the things you have, this can be as simple as air in your lungs, dishes in the sink, and having a place to sleep at night. The next focus can be on things you’ve achieved. You might look at old trophies, admiring how they look now, or things you’ve achieved like medals for races, or awards of any kind. Yes, these are past events, but the focus is on how they make you feel in the present. Finally, changing negative thoughts or past or future thinking to be about the present moment. Think about what is around you, name things you see, take a walk in a nature and admire what is nearby you. Talk with a friend, ask them about their day. Dwelling in the present can help prevent you from missing another therapy session, or skipping that walk you wanted to take.
Being able to learn a new skill comes with trial and error. Know that just because one skill didn’t work, doesn’t mean it won’t always work. If I’m feeling extra anxious, I might need more than a deep breath in that moment. The only way to really know if something isn’t working, is to try it many times before you give up. Try at least one of these tips, and see how it works for you. Give it at least 2 weeks or even a month before switching to another method. Keep reading on how to let go of things and stop procrastinating. Oh, and stay tuned because we will have more blogs on procrastination and ADHD in the future (if that’s something you’re interested in).
How to reduce procrastination and rumination
Believe it or not, you’re reading the blog of a major procrastinator… Or I need to say, “former” procrastinator. I still have my moments, but some of these skills have helped myself and my clients, so I figured it’s a good idea to share them with you. When the desire to not do anything happens, it leads to procrastination for many people. Instead of getting up off the couch, many sink in further, retreat into the tiny screens, and then feel bad about it later. Sound familiar? Well, let’s focus on how to stop this with a few techniques.
Change the tape: The first skill is to change the tape, or your thought. If the thought is, “I don’t feel like doing it”. What else could you say to yourself instead to motivate yourself? Here’s some ideas: “I don’t feel like doing it, and I’m still going to get it done anyway”, “feelings don’t get to dictate my actions, I am going for my walk”, “I may not want to attend therapy, and I will do it anyway to help stay consistent”, “Whenever I listen to these thoughts of procrastination, I feel horrible. I don’t need that today, I’m going to get my work done now”. These are just a few examples, but there are many things you can change your mind to think. One thing that can really help is to say these things aloud to yourself. It’s harder to procrastinate when your mind knows you’ve said you’ll do something. Think of it as a way to trick your brain, and to prevent you from lying to yourself.
Do a countdown: Now, I did not invent this skill… I wish I had, it’s genius. Mel Robbins came up with this method, and from experience using it, and having clients use it successfully - I’d say it works. Here’s the jist of it, but if you want to read the book it’ll be linked below. If you’re laying in bed scrolling but you want to get out of bed, start your laundry, do the dishes, etc., you’d say out loud to yourself (see it’s important to talk to yourself), “I’m done scrolling, and I’m going to get up to go start the laundry in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1” at the end of the countdown, you’re getting up and getting your laundry done. This works by way of behavioral activation. You are literally telling your brain and body what you’re about to do, and you’ve put yourself on a countdown. Take the change the tape skill with this, and practice new thoughts around things you want to be doing instead of procrastinating them. These don’t have to major life events you practice around - practice this for changing tasks, changing your negative thoughts, going to work, changing a song on the radio, putting your plate in the dishwasher. The idea is to build up your ability to respond well to what you want to be doing instead of responding to the desire to ruminate and procrastinate on things.
Set alarms, and stick to them: You and I both know it’s way to easy to hit “dismiss” on a phone alarm, or a calendar notification. I do it myself, sometimes. Here’s the method I currently use when notifications pop up that I need to do. For instance, going to a training that I’d rather not attend (it’s free, and totally optional by the way). I set my calendar to notify me 1 hour before the event. Then, instead of swiping away the notification, I let it sit on my notifications bar until I actually attend the training. Another way to engage more with alarms, calendars, etc., is to check them regularly, remind yourself of the events often, and set more than one reminder for things you need to do. For instance, if you’re trying to be on time for therapy, set your session time as 5 to 10 minutes before the session starts. Whatever you’re trying to be more consistent about, set the alarm, and do the thing the alarm says to do. Whether that’s therapy, going for a walk, etc., do the thing! By checking your calendar often, updating it regularly and sticking to simple things first (things you already do or partially enjoy doing), you’re more likely to remain consistent with the things you like to do least. Give it a try, and see how it works for you.
Conclusion
When it’s all said and done, I can write this blog much easier than it will be to apply the concepts here to your life. The truth is though, it is simple but not easy to apply anything to your life. Whether you’re learning an instrument, a new language, going running regularly, whatever it is - at first the most important thing is to do it consistently. Even if it means doing it poorly for a while, or just a little here and there. Making something part of your life and not allowing it to overtake you is the key to being consistent. Remember to use the skills to reduce the desire to lay down and do nothing. At the end of the day, if you’re not happy with where you are - there’s no harm in changing, even if it means failing a few times before you ‘get it right’. It’s okay to not have everything in one day, instant gratification won’t get you the results you want anyway. Keep working on yourself, stay consistent, and take care of you so you can take care of those you love.
Remember, your life is always in bloom - you get to choose what flower you become.
Sources
https://www.melrobbins.com/book/the-5-second-rule/
https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC11167869/
https://www.lifeinbloomcounseling.care/blog/lets-talk-how-to-make-resolutions-that-stick-in-2025
https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/depression/in-depth/depression-and-exercise/art-20046495
https://www.lifeinbloomcounseling.care/blog/back-to-basics-what-is-mental-health
https://www.lifeinbloomcounseling.care/blog/the-importance-of-getting-out-in-nature-for-your-mental-health